Losing everything I have

I have been in Dubai for about 3 1/2 years and have a serious debt problem. Altogther I have 2 loans, and 6 credit cards. I owe 601,900 Dirhams. Yes I am screwed... I take full responsibility of the debts. When I first moved over here with my wife and little girl, I took out a credit card and immediatley maxed this out, as we needed a place to live and buy furniture. Then my daughter needed to go to nursery (55000) a year. Luckly my wife got a job and brought in a second income. Anyway after moving 3 times, we had another baby (my son). Unfortunatley he wasn't very well, and was in ICU for a couple of weeks. My medical expenses only covered up to AED 20000. We needed a further AED 25,000. So I quickly arranged a loan.

 

Over in the UK my wife had a good job, she brought a house, cars, and paid for must things. But over here I thought I could change that, and that she could rely on me. I got the credit cards, I got the loans. I wanted her to be happy and not have to worry about anything. I should of said from the start about the finances. I should of never lied to my wife, my best friend. I know I have betrayed her trust for lying. There is no excuses, I can only say that I didn’t want to fail. I kept saying to myself “ I can sort this, if I just say to her that I have done it, I will be able to get it done”. The problem and being realistic is that I couldn’t apart from getting us in to more debt. I was under the misguided impression that I could fix the mess I created without anyone ever finding out about it. I have realised the full extent of what I have done. Over time, I will be able to repay my debt but I doubt that I will ever be able repair the damage I have done to us our marriage and with that fact that I have severely compromised your financial security here and at home.

I have banks calling everyday demanding payment. I'm scared to pick up the phone. Last week I even found myself driving around looking to see who I can rob. I need money to pay my debts off. All of this because I can not face the truth of what I have done. I have put myself and family in this position, but I do not know how to get us out of it???????

 

Yes I have to man up, take control of the situation.. But how on earth do I do this. I have managed to source consolidation loan from one of the banks. But they have stated that I have to reduce my current loan by AED 25,000 before they will relase the loan. HOW am I meant to reduce the current loan if I dont have the money... Catch 22 position.

 

I do not want to leave Dubai, I actually love it here. I have debt responsiblities therefore I dont want to do a runner.

 

My marraige is over, as I have lied to her many times about our financies, she has given me so many chances, but I have thrown it back in her face by lying again and again. This is I have told her everything but I know its over. I am sorry for hurting her so much.

 

 

 

Comments

  • nima
    nima
    2013-10-27T16:27:20

    I'm so sorry you're going through all this. it must be very difficult on so many levels. Could I suggest you search for 'In Debt In Dubai' on cashy - the search option is on the right at the top of the page - read her story - she had more debt than you and has been working through it. Post a comment or question and I'm sure she'll be in touch. 

    Please do let us know how you get on. 

    Perhaps send your wife this link? It's obvious you truly regret what you have done and how you chose to handle the situation.... 

    Best of luck...

  • alexie62
    alexie62
    2014-02-25T01:00:41

    I don't know if you will ever come to this blog again, I only just read it however not much has passed, but for the accumulation of your situation it may be in a worse situation, or you tried to find a solution. If you are still in the same situation, then contact me I am the writer of the debt articles in www.emirates247.com weekly on a saturday you will find it on the front page. I will discuss this with you, thanks Theda Muller

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Posted by
pc2112
On Tuesday, 22 October 2013 at 2:20 p.m.
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